Wonderfully Made

Bible reading Psalms 139:13 – 18

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

Growing up, we may have been led to believe that we were “good enough”. We probably try to become “good enough” by doing, since we weren’t acceptable just as we were. We need to be careful as we make a moral inventory not replay in our own minds all the old lies about our lack of value as human beings. This Is not the purpose of the inventory! Using it this way can be detrimental to our recovery.

We need to replace the misconceptions about our self-worth with the truth. David reflected on God’s view of us when he wrote: “You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body, and knit them together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! It is amazing to think about. Your workmanship is marvelous – and how well I know it. You were there while I was being formed in utter seclusion! You saw me before I was born and scheduled each day of my life before I began to breathe. Every day was recorded in your Book! How precious it is, Lord, to realize that you are thinking about me constantly! I can’t even count how many times a day your thoughts turn towards me.” (Psalm 139:13 – 18)

David’s glimpse of the high-value God places in our lives, even before we are, shows that our value precedes doing. By faith we need to accept this foundational truth about our basic values as human beings. We must accept that our lives are worth the pain of working through recovery.

Aspects of God’s perfect character are reflected in the lives of each and every person.

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No More Struggles

And we have ceased fighting anything and anyone – even our drug of choice!

When Celebrate Recovery found me, I thought I was in for a struggle, I celebrate recovery might provide the strength needed to beat my addiction. Victorious that fight, who knows what other battles I could win. I would to be strong, though. All my experience with life proved that. Today I don’t have to struggle or exert my will. If I take those 12 steps that Jesus Christ do the real work, my addiction problems disappear all by themselves. My living problems also cease to be struggles. I just have to ask whether acceptance – or change – is required. It is not my will, but His, that needs doing.

Matthew 11:28-29 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

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Understanding the Past

Bible reading: 1 Corinthians 3:10 – 15

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

Our addictions may already have destroyed everything we’ve worked for – our family, friendships, finances – everything may be lost. Beginning recovery is like starting back at the foundation and building a whole new life. Making an inventory should help us consider what caused our losses in the first place. That way, we’ll be able to rebuild with materials that will hold up under fire.

The apostle Paul wrote, “But he who builds on the foundation must be very careful. And no one can ever lay any other real foundation than that one we already have – Jesus Christ… Everyone’s work will be put through the fire so that all can see whether or not it keeps its value, and what was really accomplished. And every workman who has built on the foundation with the right materials, and whose work still stands, will get his pay. But if the house he has built burns up, he will have a great loss. He himself will be saved, but like a man escaping through a wall of flames. (1 Corinthians 3:10, 12 – 15).

Even though Paul was referring to the final judgment, this also applies to recovery. We know that what we use in building our old way of life didn’t hold up. By doing our inventory, we can make sure that we don’t experience further loss by repeating our past patterns, which are vulnerable to destruction. When future tests come, the lasting effects of our recovery and the rewards of our new way of life will be evident to all.

Since we have turned our lives over to God, He is the foundation on whom we must build.

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Material and Spiritual Well Being

Fear … of economic insecurity will leave us.

Having fear reduced or eliminated and having economic circumstances improve, are 2 different things. When I was new Celebrate Recovery, I had those 2 ideas confused. I thought fear would leave me only when I started making money. However, another participant in Celebrate Recovery explained it to me this way as I was chewing on my financial to: “For us, material well-being always followed spiritual progress; it never preceded.” I suddenly understood that this promise was a guarantee. I saw that it put priorities in the correct order, that spiritual progress would diminish that terrible fear of being destitute, just as it diminished many of the fears.

Today I try to use the talents God gave me to benefit others. I’ve found that is what others valued all along. I try to remember that I no longer work for myself. I only get the use of the wealth God created, I have never “owned” it. My life’s purpose is much clearer when I just work to help, not to possess.

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God’s Mercy

Bible reading: Revelation 20:11 – 15

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

We may wish we could avoid making a moral inventory; it’s normal to want to hide from examination. But in our hearts, we probably sense that day will come when we will have to look carefully at our lives.

The Bible tells us there’s a day coming when an inventory will be made of every life. No one will be able to hide. In John’s vision he saw “a great white throne and the one who sat upon it, from whose face the earth and sky fled away, but they found no place to hide. I saw the dead, great and small, standing before God; and The Books were opened, including the Book of Life. And the dead were judged according to the things written in The Books, each according to the deeds he had done… And if anyone’s name was not found recorded in the Book of Life, he was thrown into the Lake of Fire” (Revelation 20:11 – 12, 15).

It’s best to do our own moral inventory now to make sure we’re ready for the one to come. Anyone whose name is in the Book of Life is saved. This includes all who sins have been atoned for by the death of Jesus. Those who refuse God’s offer of mercy are left to be judged on the basis of their own deeds recorded in “The Books”. No one will pass that test! Perhaps now is a good time to make sure our names are in the right book. And when we know our lives are covered with God’s forgiveness, we will be able to examine them fearlessly.

We can be fearless in our inventory is have been loved and accepted by God.

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Love And Tolerance

Love and tolerance of others is our code.

I have found that I have to forgive others in all situations to maintain any real spiritual progress. The vital importance of forgiving may not be obvious to me at first sight, but my studies tell me that every great spiritual teacher has insisted strongly upon it.

I must forgive injuries, not just in words, or as a matter of form, but in my heart. I do this not for the other person’s sake, but for my own sake. Resentment, anger, or a desire to see someone punished, are things that rot it my soul. Such things fasten my troubles to me with chains. They tie me to other problems that have nothing to do with my original problem.

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A Searching Examination

Bible reading: 2 Timothy 1:9 – 11

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

Searching is more than just casually looking around; it implies an intense desire to discover what we’re looking for. What can motivate us to make a searching moral inventory, especially since we know will be uncovering our inadequacies?

God is not looking for people good enough to desire His love. Instead, God wants to find people who identify their inadequacies as a place for His love and kindness to fit into their lives. If this is true, why shouldn’t we be enthusiastic about searching, even for our failures? Every deficiency, every need, every shortcoming can make room for the love of God be displayed prominently in our lives. The apostle Paul wrote to Timothy, saying, “It is He [God] who saved us and chose us for His holy work, not because we deserved it but because it was his planned long before the world began – to show his loving kindness to us through Christ” (2 Timothy 1:9).

If we approach our inventory with the intention of looking for places in our lives for God’s mercy and love have a chance to make up for our failings, we can be enthusiastic about both the good and bad that we find there. Jude tells us, “Keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life” (Jude 1:21). Knowing that God is looking for places to display His love in our lives, we can make an intense, yet fearless, search.

Our fearless internal search brings to life areas of our lives desperate for God’s love and mercy.

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Prayer: It Works

It has been well said that “almost the only scoffers at prayer are those who never tried it enough.”

Having grown up in a Christian household, I still felt somewhat foolish when I first tried really praying. I mean praying something more than just reciting the Lord’s prayer. I knew there was a Higher Power, God, working in my life (how else was I staying sober?) But I certainly wasn’t convinced that He wanted to hear my prayers. People who had what I wanted said prayer was an important part of practicing the Celebrate Recovery program, so I persevered. With a commitment to daily prayer, I was amazed to find myself becoming more serene and comfortable with my place in the world. In other words, life became easier and less of a struggle. I’m still not sure why God listens to my prayers, but now I would never stop saying them for the simple reason that they work.

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Real Independence

The more we become willing to depend upon Jesus Christ, our one and only Higher Power, the more independent we actually are.

I start with a little willingness to trust Jesus Christ and he causes that willingness to grow. The more willingness I have, the more trust I gain, and the more trust I gain, the more willingness I have. My dependence on Jesus Christ grows as my trust in him grows. Before I became willing, I depended on myself for all my needs and I was restricted by my incompleteness.

Through my willingness to depend on my Higher Power, whom I choose to call Jesus Christ, all my needs are provided for by Someone who knows me better than I know myself – even the needs I may not realize, as well as the ones yet to come. Only Someone who knows me that well could bring me to be myself and to help me fill the need in someone else that only I am meant to fill. There never will be another exactly like me. And that is real Independence.

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Love Overcomes Fear

Bible reading: 1^st John 4:16 – 19

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

The thought of making a fearless moral inventory may sound like an impossible task. Looking at our lives on a moral basis can be very frightening. How can we get to the place where the word fearless can actually describe the moral inventory we make?

The apostle John said, “As we live with Christ, our love grows more perfect and complete; so we will not be ashamed and embarrassed at the day of judgment, but can face Him with confidence and joy, because He loves us and we love Him too. We need have no fear of someone who loves us perfectly; His perfect love for us eliminates all dread of what He might do to us” (1^st John 4:17 – 18).

Love is the key. God, who is the final judge of all morality, loves us perfectly. He doesn’t just love us if we’re perfect. Perhaps we’ve had people withhold love and shame us for our faults and failures. If we’ve only known love to be conditional, it only makes sense that admitting our faults causes us to be afraid of losing the love and acceptance we all need.

To eliminate the fear, we need to surround ourselves with unconditional love from God and other people. Only unconditional love will cover our shame and give us confidence that no matter what we find when we look at ourselves, we will always be loved. The apostle Peter affirmed this by saying, “Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love makes up for many of your faults” (1^st Peter 4:8).

Our moral inventory needs a constant review from the perspective of God’s love.

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Finger Pointing

Bible reading: Matthew 7:1 – 5

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

There have probably been times when we’ve avoided our own wrongs and problems by pointing the finger at someone else. We may be out of touch with our internal affairs because we are still blaming others for our moral choices. Or perhaps we avoid examining ourselves by making a moral inventory of all the people around us.

When God asked Adam and Eve about their sin, they both pointed the finger at someone else. “’Have you eaten the fruit from the tree I warned you about?’ ‘Yes,’ Adam admitted, ‘but it was the woman you gave me who brought me some; and I ate it.’ Then the Lord God asked the woman, ‘How could you do such a thing?’ ‘The serpent tricked me,’ she replied” (Genesis 3:11 – 13) It seems to be human nature to blame others as a first line of defense.

We also may avoid our own problems by evaluating and criticizing the lives of others. Jesus tells us, “And why worry about a speck in the eye of a brother when you have a board in your own?… Hypocrite! First get rid of the board. Then you can see to help your brother” (Matthew 7:3, 5).

While doing this step, we must constantly remind ourselves that this is a season of self-examination. We must guard against drifting off into blaming and examining the lives of others. There will be time in the future for helping others after we’ve taken responsibility for our own lives.

Our inventory should turn our focus from what others have done to what we can do.

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Mysterious Ways

… Out of every season of grief are suffering, when the hand of God seemed heavy or even in jest, new lessons for living were learned, the resources of courage were uncovered, and that finally, inescapably, the conviction came that God does “move in a mysterious way His wonders to perform.”

After losing my career, family and health, I remain unconvinced that my way of life needed a second look. My addictions were killing me, but I had never met a recovering person or a celebrate recovery member. I thought I was destined to die alone and that I deserved it. At the peak of my despair, my infant daughter was diagnosed with a rare chromosome disorder. Doctors efforts to help her proved useless. I redouble my efforts to block my feelings, but now the alcohol had stopped working. I was left staring into God’s eyes, begging for help. My introduction to celebrate recovery came years later, through an odd series of coincidences, and I have remain sober ever since. My daughter lived and her chromosome disorder seems to be in remission. The entire episode convinced me of my powerlessness and the unmanageability of my life. Today my daughter and I thank God for His intervention.

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Coming Out Of Hiding

Bible reading: Genesis 3:6 – 13

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

Many of us have spent our lives in a state of hiding, ashamed of who we are inside. We may hide by living double lives, using our drug of choice to make us feel like someone else, or by self righteously setting ourselves above others. Step 4 involves uncovering the things we’ve been hiding, even from ourselves.

After Adam and Eve disobeyed God, “Suddenly they became aware of their nakedness, and were embarrassed. So the sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves around the hips… The Lord God called to Adam, ‘Why are you hiding?’ And Adam replied, ‘I heard you coming and didn’t want you to see me naked. So I hid’” (Genesis 3:7 – 10). Human beings have been covering up and hiding ever since!

Jesus consistently confronted the religious leaders for their hypocrisy. The word hypocrite describes a person who pretends to have virtues or qualities that he really doesn’t have. Onetime Jesus said to them, “Hypocrites! You are so careful to polish the outside of the, but the inside is filed with extortion and greed… First cleanse the inside of the cup and then the whole cup will be clean” (Matthew 23:25 – 26).

When the real person inside comes out of hiding, we’ll have to deal with some dirt! Making this inventory is a good way to “cleanse the inside”; and some of that cleansing may involve bathing our lives with tears. It is only by uncovering the hidden parts of ourselves that we’ll be able to change the outer person, including our addictive/compulsive behaviors.

Confessing our hidden parts brings healing and restoration. “You can’t heal a wound by saying it’s not there! Jeremiah 6:14-16Living Bible (TLB)

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As We Understand Him

My friend suggested what then seems a novel idea… “Why don’t you choose your own conception of God?” That statement hit me hard. It melted the icy intellectual mountain in whose shadow I had lived and shivered many years. I stood in the sunlight at last. It was only a matter of being willing to believe in a power greater than myself. Nothing more was required of me to make my beginning.

I remember the times I looked up into the sky and reflected on who started it all, and how when I came to Celebrate Recovery, an understanding of some description of the spiritual dimension became a necessary adjunct to a stable sobriety. After reading a variety of versions, including the scientific, of the great explosion, I went for simplicity and made the God of my understanding the great power that made the explosion possible. With the vastness of the universe under his command, he would, no doubt, be able to guide my thinking and actions if I was prepared to accept his guidance. But I could not expect help if I turn my back on that help and when my own way. I became willing to believe and I have had 6 years of stable and satisfying sobriety.

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Constructive Sorrows

Bible reading: 2 Corinthians 7:8 – 11

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

We all have to deal with sorrow. We may try to stuff it down and ignore it. We may try to drown it or avoid feeling it by intellectualizing. But sorrow doesn’t go away. We need to accept the sorrow that will be a part of the inventory process.

Not all sorrow is bad for us. The apostle Paul had written a letter to the church in Corinth. It made them very sad because Paul was confronting them about something that they were doing wrong. At first, he was sorry that he had hurt them. But later he said, “Now I am glad I sent it, not because it hurt you, but because the pain turned you to God. It was a good kind of sorrow you felt, the kind of sorrow God wants his people to have… For God sometimes uses sorrow in our lives to help us turn away from sin and seek eternal life. We should never regret His sending it… Just see how much good this grief from the Lord did for you! You no longer shrug your shoulders, but became earnest and sincere, and very anxious to get rid of the sin.” (2 Corinthians 7:8 – 11)

Jeremiah said, “Although God gives… Grief, yet he will show compassion too, according to the greatness of his loving kindness. For he does not enjoy afflicting men and causing sorrow.” (Lamentations 3:32 – 33)

This grief was good, for it came from honest self-evaluation, not morbid self-condemnation. We can learn to accept their sorrow as a positive part of our recovery, not just as punishment.

Honest self-examination can lead us to a sorrow that inspires our growth.

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The God Idea

When we saw others solve the problems by simple reliance upon a Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work. But the God idea did.

Like a blind man gradually being restored to sight, I slowly groped my way to the Third Step. Having realized that only a Power greater than myself could rescue me from the hopeless abyss I was in, I knew that this was a Power that I had to grasp, and that it would be my anchor in the midst of the sea of woes. Even though my faith at the time was miniscule, it was big enough to make me see that it was time for me to discard my reliance on my prideful ego and replace it with a steady strength that could only come from a Power far greater than myself.

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Family Influence

Bible reading: Nehemiah 9:34 – 38

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

Our family of origin has had an influence on who we are today. Some of us want to pretend that our families were, or are, nearly perfect. Others of us may tend to avoid responsibility for our actions by blaming our families. Whatever the case, when we think about our own lives, we also need to deal with our families and the effects they have had on who we are today.

We’re told that the returned Jewish exiles “took turns confessing their own sins and those of their ancestors” (Nehemiah 9:3). They blame their ancestors for the captivity in the difficult situation they were  . They said, “they [our ancestors] refused to turn from their wickedness. So, now we are slaves here in the land of plenty that you gave to our ancestors!… And we serve them [conquering kings] at their pleasure and are in great misery” (Nehemiah 9:35 – 37).

It’s all right to admit the truth about what brought us into bondage. This might very well involve the wrongs committed by our parents and family. It’s all right to express our anger and regret over what’s been done to us. We have a right to hold others accountable and grieve over the negative effects they had on our lives. That is part of the real picture. It’s not all right to use this as an excuse for our wrong choices or for staying in bondage. They may be partly responsible for bringing us to this place. We’re responsible for moving on to a better place for ourselves and our children.

Past generations help create our present circumstances; our confessions can free us for a better future.

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The Keystone

He is the father, we are his children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.

A keystone is the wedge shaped piece at the highest part of an arch that locks the other pieces in place. The “other pieces” are steps one, two, and four through 12. In one sense this sounds like step three is the most important step, that the other 11 depend on the third for support. In reality however, step three is just one of the 12. It is the keystone, but without 11 other stones to build the base and arms, keystone or not, there will be no arch. Through daily working of all 12 steps, I find that triumphant arch waiting for me to pass through to another day of freedom.

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A World Of The Spirit

We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime.

The word “entered” and the phrase “entered into the world of the Spirit” are very significant they imply action, the beginning, getting into, a prerequisite to maintaining my spiritual growth, the “Spirit” being the immaterial part of me. Barriers to my spiritual growth our self-centeredness and the materialistic focus on worldly things. Spirituality means devotion to spiritual instead of worldly things, it means obedience to God’s will for me. I understand spiritual things to be: unconditional love, joy, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, self-control and humility. Anytime I allow selfishness, dishonesty, resentments and fear to be a part of me, I block Spiritual things. As I maintain my sobriety, growing spiritually becomes a lifelong process. My goal is spiritual growth, accepting that I’ll never have spiritual perfection.

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Confession

Bible reading: Nehemiah 9:1 – 3

Step 4 - We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Lamentations 3:40

Principle 4 –  Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps  4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

The heart of our moral inventory will probably deal with our destructive habits, defects of character, the wrongs we’ve done, the consequences that we now live with, and the hurt we’ve caused others. It’s like sifting through all the garbage. This part is painful, but a necessary part of throwing away those rotten habits and behaviors that are spoiling the rest of our lives.

The returned Jewish exiles are described as “confessing their own sins” (Nehemiah 9:3); this phrase speaks volumes. The word confessing means “to bemoan something by wringing of the hands” and also “to throw away”. The word sins means “offenses and their occasions”; it can also refer to habitual sinfulness and the consequences of such behavior.

This can serve as a model for us to follow. We can list the occasions of our offenses, our destructive habits, and the consequences were brought into our lives and the lives of others. Let’s also look at what was done within the process of “confessing their own sins”. They owned each part; they bemoaned each part; and then they threw it all away. Their inventory was a time of cleaning out the garbage. After this they were better able to make a new start.

In dealing with the garbage in our lives we can “own” it by taking personal responsibility for our choices and actions. We can "bemoan” it by allowing ourselves to grieve. We can “throw it away” by leaving it behind and turning towards the future.

Our time of confession should be a time of celebration.

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